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Korean - American..... 
04:45am 27/06/2007
  *Is it just me, or is the view of Asian-America completely skewed? I hear a lot of African American's piss and moan about how the media has inaccurately potrayed their culture, but it's hard to find an Asian in Hollywood that's not either a complete tool or a martial artist. Does this bother anyone else?

**My first trip back to Korea happened recently on a US Navy deployment. I was met with some distasteful looks (It could have been curiosity, I wasn't willing to find out which)... a Korean in an American uniform. I guess that is to be expected when you ask another country to help liberate ya.


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I have a question towards all other Koreans & their knees 
03:32pm 25/06/2007
  Here is a very strange question. Being Korean, would that explain why my knees seem inverted compared to other caucasions' knees. It seems that when I walk, my knees kind of cave towards the back instead of lunging forward.

Is it just me or is this a common trait?

I had a few people point it out to me that my knees are weird and I was curious about it ever since.


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Going back to Korea 
03:51pm 01/05/2007
  Have you gone back to visit Korea and what has your experience been?

I was adopted when I was six years old, so old enough to remember some of my life. My older brother was adopted with me, he was 8. We remember a little bit about our father and mother. In 2000 we went back to visit with an adoptee group. It was just the adoptees, no families, and all adults. Most of us had never been back before.

Six months later my brother quits his job and moves to South Korea to learn Hangul. His new girlfriend, whom he met on our trip, joined him a few months later. I didn't really ever want to go back again. It was a traumatic enough experience as it was. My brother found out that our father died six months after our adoption and that if we wanted to we could find our mother. We both decided against it (our mother abandoned us when I was 4).

Fast forward to February 2006. My boyfriend is graduating from his doctorate and applies for a job in South Korea. He doesn't get it. We talk about the idea of moving to Korea and I tell him that I really have no desire to live in South Korea again. He gets a job at the University he graduated from, but another position has opened in South Korea at the same University for a postdoc. He says he's going to apply for it and doesn't. I find out it's because I don't want to live in South Korea and he doesn't want our relationship to end. I tell him to apply because no matter where he goes I will follow him. So he applies and two weeks later gets an email from the head of the math department at KAIST University in Daejeon offering him a position for two years. We're getting married in 3 months and moving to South Korea. I'm terrified. I wouldn't do this for anyone else but him.
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Happy Arrival Day 
10:33am 27/04/2007
  Twenty two years ago, today, I made my way across the world and arrived in Detroit to my new parents.

I don't usually think about my adoption very much, but April 27th, I always get caught up in thinking about the sociological effects of transracial adoption. Sometimes, I'm not quite sure if I'm for it or against it.

I found some videos on YouTube that features Korean Adoptee Lynne Connor. I couldn't believe how many things she said that was EXACTLY what I think and feel. (I'll embed them at the lj-cut at the bottom of the post)

Being adopted has caused a lot of positive and negative things in my life. I usually think that it's been more of the latter, but regardless, it's tough to keep thinking that I have been living with this Korean-but-not-really identity for 22 years and I still haven't really grasped it. I've been involved with Asian American groups all over my campus and community, but it just isn't the same.

Recognizing that there is an Asian America is great and definitely a big step from society seeing every Asian as internationals or "FOBs" (fresh off the boat's). But it seems so difficult for society to push that one more step and realize that Asian Adoptee isn't the same as Asian American. Though we share the desire to not be considered Asian Internationals by snap judgements and we both are consistently fighting stereotypes, there is something very distinctive about Asian Adoptees- there really isn't any Asian in us.

Of course, I'm speaking with the perspective of an adoptee who arrived in America at the mere age of 3 months. It just feels so odd that because of a three month span of time, I cannot be viewed as 100% plain American. I have to choose between the illfitting labels of Asian American or Asian International. Where is our label?

The activist inside me wants to rally our troops and start a new movement. As an almost-graduate with a BA in history, I want to start researching the social and economic history of this wave of new Americans. I want to begin having conferences for adopted children and their mismatched-color parents, bringing a level of understanding that these children will feel out of place and how to address that, sensitively and effectively. I want to address the identity issues that I have struggled with that no other group of people have had to even think about.

Maybe I'm too sensitive. Maybe nobody else has felt this way. What do you guys think?? I'd love to start a dialogue here.

Lynne Connor video clipsCollapse )
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I need assistance, but not sure what to do 
05:21pm 06/11/2006

As you know I was adopted through a foreign adoption agency located in the U.S. I came from Korea, but that is not my issue at this time.

Stupidly I lost my naturalization card and my certificate of adoption. I only have my original passport coming from Korea to the U.S. which is 30 years old now. I have documents leading up to my adoption and a letter confirming that I've been adopted, but not the actual documents. How do I go about to obtaining copies if I do need them.

Right now I'm trying to apply for a U.S. Passport and I think I need those documents.

If you can offer any suggestion of what I can do or if my driver's license & marriage license, etc... are good enough.

Thank you so much in advance,

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21 Years. 
08:36pm 27/04/2006
  Today's my Arrival Day! 21 years ago, I flew into Detroit and was given to my new family.

I've had my ups and I've definitely had my downs. But I've been fortunate enough to live a pretty good life.

I always think about my birthparents on this day. Whether they mourn the day that I was officially lost to them. Whether they really even know what happened to me. I'll never know.

But anyway, that's today. I'm a fairly well-adjusted person who is consistently wrestling with her own identity, but I keep telling myself that it was worth it.
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Felt like sharing how or why I was adopted 
01:53pm 18/03/2006
  I just was in the mood to share the story of why my parents chose to adopt me. I'm not giving excuses for why they were mean to me the way they were, but they most definitely had issues prior to adopting me.

just a warning, it is a little graphic & sad in natureCollapse )
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.-~*Introduction and stuff*~-. 
07:20am 24/02/2006
mood: sleepy
Hello, I just found this community, though I've been on LJ for almost 2 years. It, oddly enough, only occurred to me within the past few weeks that there might be an adopted Korean LJ community out there. I wish it was a little bigger, but it seems like it's been active lately, so I decided to join :) I was adopted when I was 3 months old. I have a sister who is also adopted from Korea, though we are not biologically related. I just wanted to drop a line and say hi to my fellow adoptees. I'm glad I was adopted, or else I wouldn't have the life that I do now, but there's always that nagging "what if" in my head. The thoughts of possibilities and unlived futures. I don't talk about how I feel about my adoption or being adopted too often with my friends because no one can really relate, so I'm glad I found this place.

I also wanted to recommend this book, called Yell-Oh Girls by Vickie Nam, in case anyone here hasn't read it. It's about growing up Asian-American, and it's a collected group of essays/poems and overall experiences from girls who grew up Asian-American. Some things I can't relate to because they are about families that emigrated or somesuch, but there are adoptees in the book too. I also related to the editor because she grew up near Rochester, New York, which isn't far from where I live. Sometimes it makes me sad, sometimes it makes me happy, but it's a very good read.

x-posted to korean_adoptees
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I need your help. 
02:33pm 19/02/2006
  There was an episode of Mind of Mencia where Carlos was talking about Asian adoption at the end of the episode. He said things like "Why buy a kid who's going to just total all your cars" and other crap like that. I can't think of which episode it was, but I need to know because I'm hosting a discussion group this upcoming Tuesday on challenges facing Asian adoptees. Would any of you know what episode I'm talking about?? Thanks!  
Is it just me or do any of us asian americans get offended? 
11:41pm 20/01/2006
mood: content

I was wondering if Its just me or do other non-whites ever get offened when asked "So where are you from?"? For me its like I hear it all the time. So much so that I eventually get slightly offended because if I were a white person that walked into a store/gas station/just about anywhere, I probably wouldn't get asked that question. But because I have asian features, its now an automatic that I get asked. At least they ask I guess instead of assuming. This one time this person asked where I was from and I said Michigan. He said no where were you from originally. I replied Plymouth Michigan? he he he I was so tired of answering the question and then having to explain the fact that No I don't speak the language.

What do you guys think?

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A poem I wrote about my birth mother that I don't know 
09:28pm 19/01/2006
mood: nostalgic
The following is a poem I wrote in dedication to the mother that left me behind. Which eventually lead to me being placed into an orphanage. 31 years later, I am now a married woman who still reflects on the memories that I wish I had remembered of so long ago...

You looked at me so softly with tears running down your cheek
You knew you had to be strong but you just felt so weak
I was so tiny and innocent just trying to live
Knowing in your heart, you yourself had nothing more you could give
So behind the glass you said your goodbye
Ran out the door and began to cry
That day the paper and ink is what hurt you so much
What took me away for so long … not being able to feel your touch

Years past by and I began to think …
Am I just made of that paper and ink?
Thoughts ran through my head of hurt, anger, and fear
Wondering if you ever did shed a tear
Thirty one years ago my life was spared
I realize now you did this only to be fair
I was so little I didn’t know what was best
As I cried held so close to your chest
But as I look now at what I’ve become
What I was able to accomplish and have done
I was given a new chance
A different life to dance
It took many years and unselfish eyes
To understand why you had to ignore your baby’s cries.
I'm new to Live Journal 
03:11pm 19/01/2006
mood: cheerful

I am very new to Live Journal and I'm not really sure what to say.
My name is Julie Wynn. I am an adopted Korean. I would love to share my experiences as well as hearing about all of yours. Its been a little over 29 years since I was adopted. I am very interested in obtaining any information on my birth family but since it was a closed adoption, I'm not able to obtain any information. I've hired several P.I.'s but came up unsuccessful. In the meantime, I'm pretty happy with my life, but there is always that part of me that is missing. I always feel incomplete not knowing my past.

I'd love to talk and read about other's stories.


Julie Wynn
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An Interesting Article: The truth behind some KAD adoptions 
12:31pm 18/01/2006

Hi Everyone -

I've been hearing a lot of information lately about the lies, half-truths and coercion leading up to our adoptions and was recently directed to an interesting article that I think you'd like to read. 


I also recommend seeing Deann Borshay Liem's documentary film, "First Person Plural" and was also told of another: Tammy Tolle's "Searching for Go Hyang"...
10:40am 25/11/2005
  I have a friend doing a paper on the real world, and how it has changed from the first season, to now.

she is wondering how asian americans feel when they are stereotyped in the media...and what stereotypes these are.

I love to play off the stereotype with ppl that I can trust...such as eating rice. But other than that, I am not aware of the media and how it does this.

any help would be appreciated...thanks!
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08:06pm 18/08/2005
  hi, just joined. last week was the anniversary of when i was adopted, i have been here for 19 years. I was adopted when i was 4 1/2 years old. i was very lucky to have been adopted from south korea at that age, practically no one wants a child, everyone wants an infant.

i am very grateful to my mom and i love her dearly. i would never wish to have had my life in korea, nor would i ever search for my birth parents, i already have a wonderful mom. the only point i see in meeting my birth parents are for my medical history. thanx to them i have had quite a medical history of my own and i wonder what else tehre is to expext, especially as i look forward to having kids.

the other thing i have to comment on is i agree with the previous poster about being a white asian. as a kid, i grew up in a small town not even deemed a town but a hamlet and there were 6 asians. by the time i was in high school there were 8-10 asians of 1200 students. every where i go i am part of less than 1 percent of all asians not just koreans.

anyone else experience walking by the mirror and being surprised by the asian face reflecting back? i talk without an accent, i cant speak korean other than 10 words plus counting to 10. i can only write my name in korean and that is because i had to ask a korean woman. i do all the things every other american does, same music, clothes, and shamefully i know very little of my heritage.

thanks for letting me share.
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02:16pm 25/07/2005
mood: contemplative

i'm new to the community. i'm 22 years old, currently living in St.Paul/Eagan Mn.

i was adopted when i was 10 weeks old, and i have a younger sister who is also from S.K. we're not biologically related.
both my parents are white.

i have no friends that are asian, due to the fact that they are scarce around the white suburb i live in.
not only that but i feel as if i'm a "white asian", i'm too white for the asian people, and the white people i know don't even consider me asian.

i just joined this community to find people who relate to me better, seems as though now that i'm getting older, it's hard for me to deal with not having any real relation to my parents. not knowing if i should be looking out for bad health problems, and just the fact that i look nothing like them.

i think me being adopted has made me feel disconnected from everything, a lot of the times i think that if i weren't adopted and i was still in S.K. my life would have been "better", it's hard to explain what i mean. obviously since i was put up for adoption my life wouldn't have been that good based on the fact that i could be living in poverty right now.. but anyway.. i have no intrest in seeing my birth "mother".
i love my adoptive parents, but it's hard for them to understand how i feel since neither of them are adopted.

but yea. hello.! this post came out more serious than i had planned. but yes.
add me, i'm always looking for new friends.

<3 annie
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11:29am 22/06/2005
mood: frustrated
I just watched an episode of Home Delivery and they had set up a mother to meet her daughter that she had given up for adoption at birth.

I've struggled with being adopted, especially the past couple years. I'm not an angry person, by any means. But I can't help but feel resentment towards my birth mother. I mean, I was abandonded. I wasn't just given up at a hospital after birth, nor was I taken somewhere and lovingly given to another family. I was left at a hospital. Just given to somebody randomly while the person who had given me away just left. I didn't even have a name.

My Korean name, Kim Hyun-Jee was given to me by the hospital. It's the only thing I have that connects me to my entire heritage, culture, and birthplace. It's tattooed on my back.

The inevitable question is, "Would you ever want to meet your birthparents?"

I don't know. A part of me wants to say, "Hell, no. They didn't give a shit about me, why should I give a shit about them?" Another part of em wants to say, "Yes. I've been trying to find out who I am as a person for so long that it would complete me." And another part of me wants to just avoid the whole question all together.

The biggest problem I have with being adopted is that I feel so ... incomplete. I mean, I had a whole different family. I had a different life. I was in another fucking country and would have grown up with a different language, a different outlook on life, and a biological family. I feel so... deprived.

My likes and dislikes would have been different. My philosophy on life would be different. I probably would be a Buddhist. I would most likely be thinner and more in shape.

If you could imagine your life... and then think about how one decision made by some person was the complete foundation of your life... It just might blow your mind.

What if I'm a dark secret of my birth parents'? What if they're ashamed of me? Chalk one up for being a disappointment to parents only days after being born.

I know that there's the argument that, "Well, they were probably poor and couldn't afford to keep you." Yeah, sometimes I think about that. And sometimes I'm much more positive on being adopted than I'm being right now. It just affects me differently from time to time. I just wish I knew.

Whoever said ignorance was bliss didn't realize that unanswered questions are hell.
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New here 
04:05am 13/04/2005
  Hey - I'm 20 years old, living in Columbus OH. I was adopted from S. K. too and I think it's pretty cool that there's a community here for us. I've been having a lot of issues lately about being adopted. I was just wondering if you guys had any of the same issues. My biggest thing is that I feel so incomplete in my life because I didn't have the priviledge of experiencing my Korean culture first hand. My entire family is Norwegian... nonetheless, I don't really "fit in" with them, even though they've been my family for my entire life, minus 3 months. Is this something that you guys have thought about as well?  
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Photo Gallery 
09:23am 22/03/2005
mood: bouncy
go to http://www.ezdzns.com/mina/gallery - and let me know what you think about the design :) too green?

11:37pm 21/02/2005
  hey im valerie 23 and adopted - i guess today was the day i was seeping through all the asian communities... oh ya im korean... just wanted to say hi ~ i have a 21 month old half korean half caucasin little girl... lookin forward to getting to know some korean adopted people... :)  
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